While doing some research for a project I came across a synopsis for The Hawkline Monster: A Gothic Western that I felt needed to be reproduced here for posterity. (The synopsis is from The Encyclopedia of Weird Westerns, in case you’re curious.)
In 1902 Oregon, the twin Hawkline daughters hire professional gunmen Greer and Cameron to kill a monster that lives in the ice caves beneath their Victorian mansion. The monster has transformed its creator Professor Hawkline into an elephant-foot umbrella stand and shrunk their seven-foot butler into a 3-inch dwarf.
Yes. The first sentence sounds like the best book ever, the second sentence sounds like it’s written by Shel Silverstein. Needless to say, this has gone to the top of my to-read pile.